Listen to the Music
by CastiellaWinchester94
Summary: So this is where I'm going to put my collection of one shots about songs... I'm going to leave the two that are up already up, but also include them as the first two chapters... after that, each new one shot will be added here. Most will be Destiel, but I'm open to suggestions! Oh! and before I forget, I don't own any of the songs or Supernatural!
1. The Idea

OK. So, I'm a huge music buff… and Supernatural? Well, my friends can tell you about that, haha. I'm a big fan of Destiel, Sabriel, Samifer, and if I'm feeling it, Megstiel. I will write basically any ship you can comprehend, if you don't believe me, check out the first chapter of **_If I Was Your Vampire._** I don't know how that happened… but I'm blaming the inspiration faeries that hound me. Anywho, if you have a song you would like done as a story, let me know! If you have a ship you would like done, let me know, and I'll try to find a ship to match.

So far the chapter list is as follows:

-Funny How a Melody Sounds Like a Memory (Based on Springsteen by Eric Church)

-A Heart Don't Forget (Based on Something like That by Tim McGraw)

-Hitching Down the Road of Life (Based on Born to be My Baby by Bon Jovi)

-Are We Gonna Do This or What? (Based on Are You Gonna Kiss Me or Not? By Thompson Square)

-From the Moment I Could Talk (Based on Father and Son by Cat Stevens)

-Cut My Life Into Pieces (Based on Last Resort by Papa Roach)

-If Love is What You Need, a Soldier I Will Be (Based on Angel with a Shotgun by The Cab)

-An Angel's Smile is What You Sell (Based on You Give Love a Bad Name by Bon Jovi)

-Last Ones Standing (Based on No Matter What by Papa Roach)

-Love is Like a Bomb (Based on Pour Some Sugar on Me by Def Leppard)

-Am I Still Enough (Based on Do I by Luke Bryan)

-All They See is Scars (Based on Skin by Sixx A.M.)

-Hell, Yes, I Love My…Baby (Based on I Love Your Love the Most by Eric Church)

-I Hope He Buys You Flowers (Based on When I Was Your Man by Bruno Mars)

-Would They Know How Much I Care? (Based on If Tomorrow Never Comes by Garth Brooks)

-The Beat Ain't Bad (Based on The Queen of New Orleans by Jon Bon Jovi)

-When the Sound of Little Feet (Based on Remember When by Alan Jackson)

The Alt. Ending is the next chapter… not necessary to read, but if you like evil feels, go at it.

-So Only Say My Name (Based on Just One Yesterday by Fall Out Boy)

-Cross My Heart and Hope to Die (Based on One More Night by Maroon 5)

-Who Do You Think You Are? (Based on jar of hearts by Christina Perri)

-But When I Sleep, You're Everywhere (Based on Everywhere by Michelle Branch)

-Nothing Like a Funeral to Make You Feel Alive (Based on Life is Beautiful by Sixx A.M.)

-The Greatest Fan of Your Life (Based on I'll Be by Edwin McCain)

-I Don't Love You, But I Always Will (Based on Poison and Wine by the Civil Wars)

-Don't You Ever Say I Just Walked Away (Based on Wrecking Ball by Miley Cyrus)

-When All Your Dreams are Shattered (Based on Stand by You by Marlisa)

-When I Was a Young Boy (Based on Welcome to the Black Parade by My Chemical Romance)

-500 Channels of Nothing but Bad News On (Based on Why Don't We Just Dance by Josh Turner)

-Masquerading as a Man with a Reason (Based on Carry on My Wayward Son by Kansas)

-I Got a Million Things That Need to be Done (Based on Everything I Shouldn't be Thinking About by Thompson Square)

So if you have any ideas, let me know!

Thanks and I love you all!

-Cas

**Alright! I've got a whole slew of songs… between suggestions and ideas of my own. So, keep the suggestions coming! I will use them… plus they feed the inspirational faeries! **

**One more thing…. I changed the rating because of Cut My Life Into Pieces. It's a little more intense than my other chapters, so I felt it warranted a rating change.**


	2. Funny How a Memory Sounds Like a Melody

**A/N: I know, I know... I should be working on If I Was Your Vampire... but those inspirational little fairies hit me... and yeah. Hope you guys like it! Oh! The characters might be a little OOC because I was trying, maybe a little too hard, to get them to fit with the song.**

Dean flipped through the stations, looking for a good classic rock station. Suddenly he found himself on one blasting Glory Days_. _He smiled to himself, as he was transported back in time, to 1994.

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><p>Dean Winchester would never forget that summer. One summer that's all it was, before his senior year in high school. His dad had moved them to California the month before and Dean spent most of his days, down on the beach, surfing, or watching girls or, sometimes, guys. One hot day in the middle of July, that all changed.<p>

He was sitting in his Jeep, listening to _Born in the USA _for probably the hundredth time. Bruce Springsteen was the Boss for a reason, and Dean knew every word to the songs on the album, as well as _Born to Run. _After the song finished, Dean turned off the radio, grabbed his surfboard from the back and jogged down to the water. He smiled when he saw the size of the waves crashing into the shore, it was going to be a great day to be riding the waves.

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><p>The next thing he knew, Dean was looking into the bluest eyes he'd ever seen, followed by the sexiest voice he'd ever heard, "Are you alright?"<p>

Dean reached up and felt a knot on his head. He tried to sit up and the world spun a bit. "What happened?"

"You hit your head on a rock when you wiped out." Blue eyes said, "and you shouldn't try to sit up, you've been unconscious for a few minutes, you could have a concussion."

"I'm OK." Dean said, as he sat up. He turned to face the guy and saw that the dude's eyes weren't his only amazing feature. He had raven hair, mussed up, giving the appearance of permanent bed-head, or maybe just great sex-hair. His cuttoff jeans showed off his incredible body, complete with a warm tan. Dean found himself at a loss for words for a minute, before he noticed the guy had tilted his head, concerned. "I'm Dean Winchester. Nice to meet you..."

"Castiel. Castiel Novak." Castiel shook Dean's hand, warm and strong. "Are you sure you're OK?"

"Yeah. I've been through worse." Dean said, smiling, as he got up. He realized as soon as he was up that it was a mistake, if Castiel hadn't caught him, he probably would have fallen to the ground. "Thanks, Cas."

Castiel tilted his head a bit, and Dean couldn't help but notice how adorable the action was. "Cas?"

"Sorry. You're name's a bit of a mouthful." Dean said, blushing.

"It's alright. So where do you live, Dean?"

"Trying to get me home, already Cas?"

"Yes." Castiel said, as he noticed Dean raise an eyebrow, "No! Not like that. I don't feel comfortable letting you drive home like this. Obviously, you're not going to a hospital, so I thought I would drive you home."

"Oh. OK." Dean said, smirking when he saw Cas blush. "So, where's your car?"

Castiel looked down slightly, "I don't have one actually. I don't live that far from here, so most of the time, I just walk, or catch a ride from my brother."

"You can drive though right?" Dean asked, getting a nod. "OK. I'm going to let you do something that I don't let many people do. You can drive my Jeep. I don't live that far from here either, so you should be ok."

Castiel nodded, looking at the orange Wrangler. "OK. Can you walk?"

Dean tried to take a couple steps, and almost fell again. Castiel laughed lightly, and Dean found himself smiling at the sound. "I don't think so, man."

"That's alright. I'll help you." Castiel said grabbing Dean's hand and putting his other hand around Dean's waist to help keep the boy up. After a couple stumbles, they made it to the Jeep and after awkwardly getting Dean into the passenger seat, Castiel ran back to get the surfboard. Once he was situated in the driver's seat, he looked at Dean and laughed again, reaching his hand out. "I might need the keys."

Dean dug through his pockets and handed Castiel the keys. When the Jeep started, I'm On Fire started playing loudly through the speakers. Dean smiled and pulled a lighter out of his pocket and started swaying with the beat.

"Dean. What are you doing?"

"Aw, come on. It's a classic Springsteen tune!"

"If you say so, Dean." Castiel said as he pulled out of the parking lot and following Dean's directions, headed to Dean's house. He pulled in next to a sleek black Impala in the driveway less than five minutes later. "Dean. Who's car is this?"

"My dad's. He said when I get old enough, it'll be mine, but right now, I've got the Jeep."

Castiel opened the door and supported Dean again, helping him to the door. They tripped a bit on the stairs, and Castiel ended up lying down on the porch, with Dean on top of him. Before either of the boys realized what had happened, they were kissing. Cas let out a small moan, which only seemed to work Dean up and they probably would've kept going if they hadn't been interrupted by someone clearing their throat. Dean looked up and smiled, shyly, "Hi, Dad."

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><p>After they had been given the ground rules from their parents, Dean and Castiel were inseparable. One day, after they had expressed their feelings for each other, Dean took Castiel to a tattoo parlour in town and with the help of the artist, he got a tattoo of Castiel's handprint on his shoulder. He knew there would be hell to pay when he went home, but frankly he didn't care, and neither did Castiel.<p>

When Dean finally got home, his dad was waiting for him. "What's up, Dad?"

"Get ready to leave, son, we're going to Nevada."

"What? School starts in a week!"

"We'll figure that out later. Right now, you need to get packed."

"What about Cas?"

"What about him?"

"I need to say goodbye!"

John sighed at his son, "You've got 20 minutes. We leave in an hour, OK?"

"OK." Dean pulled out of the driveway and sped to Castiel's house three blocks away. He ran up to the door and knocked... and knocked... and knocked. Finally, he looked in the house and saw that no one was home. Digging through his Jeep, he found some paper and a pen.

_Dear Cas,_

_I'm sorry I couldn't say this in person, but I have to go. We're moving to Nevada. I just wanted to say that I'll never forget you, and that I love you._

_-Dean._

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><p>Dean wasn't lying when he said he wouldn't forget. Whenever he heard <em>Born in the USA, <em>he thought of that summer he spent with Castiel, and would look at his tattoo and wonder what the man was doing, and wonder if Castiel did the same.

**A/N: Hey! So I've been listening to some awesome country music and thinking of using them as the basis for some stories.. they would be like this, basically taking the lyrics and turning them into a story... other songs I was considering were I Love Your Love the Most (also Eric Church) and Everything I Shouldn't Be Thinking About (Thompson Square). If you have a request, PM me, or comment it, or whatever... and remember, reviews fuel the fire! **


	3. A Heart Don't Forget

**A/N: This is basically a sequel-ish thing for ****_Funny How a Melody Sounds Like a Memory, _****if you didn't read that, don't worry, this works just fine as a stand alone... I just had a few reviewers who were not so appreciative of sad feels. Don't say I never listen to ya'll. :P I love you!**

**Dean's POV:**

Dean pulled into a gas station just outside Monterey, almost at the Bay. He smiled to himself, thinking about the last time he'd been here.

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><p>Living in California is pretty awesome, especially when you're 17 and all you care about is girls, surfing, and living life up. So, Dean Winchester was having the time of his life. He'd been in California for a month, and he planned to have as much fun as he could over the summer, maybe a fling or two, but nothing more.<p>

As it turns out, fate had other plans. He ended up falling head over heels for a lifeguard at the beach, Castiel Novak. Looking back, Dean couldn't see what Cas saw in him, but he was glad to have someone to share the summer with. They spent most of their time on the beach, talking, and occasionally making out under the boardwalk.

One of the memories that stuck out most to Dean was a barbecue his dad had thrown on the fourth and somewhere during dinner, Dean had gotten BBQ sauce down his shirt. Later in the evening, Dean finally noticed, and when he asked Cas about it, the boy had just smiled.

"It's adorable." Cas had said, smiling, before kissing him. "It suits you."

"A barbecue stain on my white t-shirt suits me?" Dean said laughing. "Everyone must think I'm a slob."

"Just when you eat." Cas kissed Dean again, and they ended up slipping away for some alone time, on the beach under the stars.

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><p>Dean was never a self-conscious person, but he still remembered the first time they kissed. The entire drive back from the beach to his house he'd been watching Cas, who had offered to drive him home to make sure he was OK. He knew he wanted to kiss him, it was all he could think about, but he was too nervous. If they hadn't tripped on the steps, it probably wouldn't have happened at all.<p>

**Cas's POV:**

Castiel had lived in Monterey his entire life. His parents could afford it, and after being sent through medical school, he could easily afford a nice house on the beach. He loved taking his Carrera convertible through the hills and had been doing so when he realized that his car was getting pretty low on fuel. As he made his way back to the town, he found himself thinking about his last summer before college.

* * *

><p>Castiel was working as a lifeguard and ended up having to pull this gorgeous boy about his age out of the water after the guy had wiped out surfing. He ended up giving Dean, that was his name, a ride home, to make sure he got there safely. They ended up kissing on the porch and spent the rest of the summer together.<p>

Castiel's favourite memory from that summer was going to the carnival. He'd been before, but there was something different about going with that someone special. They went on all the rides, taking several rounds on the Ferris wheel, each time half-hoping to get stuck at the top. Before they went home, they had split a funnel cake and some cotton candy. Dean started smiling big at Castiel, and when he began to chuckle, Castiel knew something was up.

"What?" He asked. "Do I have something on my face?"

Dean kept smiling, and motioned to one side of his mouth, "Cotton candy."

Castiel tried to find it, rubbing his face, "Did I get it?"

"Nope." Dean said, leaning in, "Let me help you."

Dean kissed Castiel, just to the side of his mouth, and Castiel could feel him licking the cotton candy. Moments later, Dean was kissing Castiel's lips, and Castiel could taste the sugar on Dean.

* * *

><p>Castiel pulled into the gas station and saw a classic black Chevy Impala. It couldn't be. The last time he'd seen a car like that, John Winchester, Dean's dad, had been driving it. As Castiel pulled in behind it at the pumps, the driver came out of the store. There was no mistaking those green eyes.<p>

"Dean?"

Dean turned when he heard his name. That voice. "Cas?"

Castiel walked quickly up to the man and hugged him. Even though it had been almost 15 years, he still loved Dean, even though Dean had left, just leaving a note.

Dean hugged back, smiling. "How are you? Damn. That was a silly question. Look at your car, you're obviously doing OK."

Castiel laughed, leaning on his hood. "Looks like you finally got Baby. Dean, it is so good to see you. You have no idea how much I've missed you since you left."

"I know, me too, man. I didn't want to leave like that, but my Dad got transferred and you weren't home when we left. I'm sorry." Dean walked up to Castiel and kissed him, not anything like they'd had when they were younger, just soft and sweet. "Are you doing anything, did you want to maybe get dinner somewhere? Maybe a movie?"

* * *

><p><strong>AN: There. Better, guys? Haha... Sorry that it was kinda jumpy, but they're together now. :)**


	4. Hitching Down the Road of Life

**A/N: OK... we all know that Dean loves 80s hair metal, and even though "Bon Jovi {only} rocks on occasion," I personally love his music, so here we go! :D (This is based on Born to be My Baby).**

Dean Winchester sighed as he walked in the door. He walked over to the kitchen, where his boyfriend Castiel had just started dinner. Dean leaned over to reach Castiel's cheek and gave him a quick kiss. "Hey, babe, how was your day?"

Castiel smiled, "Hon, you're all wet."

Dean laughed lightly, "Not yet..."

Castiel gave him a slight eye roll and a bitch face he must have learned from Sam at some point.

"Sorry, couldn't resist. It's raining again outside, and it's freezing. I think I'm gonna change real quick." When he came back from their bedroom, wearing sweats and a hoodie, he sat down at the kitchen counter and sighed when he saw the pile of bills that had to be paid. He looked at his notebook, which was covered in math, adding his and Castiel's paychecks together and subtracting the bills. "Babe, it looks like we barely scraped by this month. I don't know how we're gonna keep doing this, especially if stuff keeps breaking, like the heater is threatening to."

Castiel looked at his boyfriend from the stove and sighed. "We'll make do Dean, we always do."

"How can you have so much faith?"

"I have you," Castiel had moved over to the small table and lit a candle. Before he could make it back to the stove, Dean reached out and grabbed him around the waist, pulling him in tight. He gave Castiel a few kisses on the neck.

"Hey, do we have any of that wine left that we swiped from Sammy's wedding?"

Castiel laughed, "I think so. Try on top of the fridge."

"What's it doing there?"

"I thought it would be safer there, especially after the last time you tried to help me cook."

Dean smirked at the memory, "OK, I'll give you that one, but that was fun."

Castiel gave a small affirmative sound. He grabbed some plastic plates from the cupboard and spooned some food from the frying pan on each plate, while Dean poured a couple glasses of wine for the two of them.

Halfway through their little dinner, Dean looked at his boyfriend, "You know I'll always be here, right, baby?"

"I know. I wish sometimes I knew what was in store for us, but I know that we'll always be together."

The two of them talked about their days at work, Dean at his uncle's garage and Castiel at the library. After they cleaned up the table and the dishes, they sat on the couch and started a movie on their little TV.

Halfway through, Dean noticed that Castiel had fallen asleep on his shoulder. Dean smiled to himself and nudged Castiel's shoulder lightly. "Babe? You awake?"

"'S.. 'm awake." Cas mumbled.

"OK. Let's go to bed. We can finish the movie tomorrow."

Cas didn't answer but let Dean lead him to their bedroom. Dean changed and then saw that Cas hadn't moved from the bed. Chuckling lightly, he helped his boyfriend change into some pajamas and get under the blanket. He went to the wall by the door and turned out the light and snuck under the covers, pulling Castiel to him, so that they were cuddled together.

"I love you, Castiel Novak." He said quietly in Castiel's ear.

"I 'ove you, too, Dee Win..." Castiel trailed off, talking more in his sleep than anything.

Dean kissed Castiel on his shoulder and started lightly humming "Hey Jude," and within minutes the couple was asleep, forgetting about their problems for a little, comfortable in their own little world.

**A/N: Don't forget, reviews keep this train a rollin'! Those semi-annoying inspirational fairies need food, and they ****_love love love _****reviews!**


	5. Are We Gonna Do This or What?

**A/N: So because of an AWESOME review from **_**swlfangirl,**_**you guys are getting a double update tonight (those first couple chapters don't count, lol). This one is based **_**Are You Gonna Kiss Me or Not? **_**by Thompson Square. I'm gonna say right now that I borrowed the name from the amazingly awesome ****hunters-of-221B-from-Gallifrey.**** We are co-writing a story together, but in one of her stories (Best Days of Our Lives), Dean and Cas's little girl is named Mary Jo. I suggest you read it, it's a cool story (and so is the first one of the set (Sweet Child of Mine).**

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><p>Castiel looked down at his hand, smiling. He and Dean had been together for 15 years, and married for 10. He still couldn't believe how lucky he was. As he waited for Dean to come home from work, so that they could go on an anniversary date, he showed some old pictures to their daughter, Mary Jo, who had just turned 8.<p>

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><p>Castiel and Dean had been friends since freshman year of high school. However, during the summer between their sophomore and junior years, everything changed. The first big thing that happened was that Dean's mum died in a car crash. After that, Castiel's father went missing, and no one, including the police, could find him. <strong>(Sorry! Don't hate me!) <strong>The two of them found themselves closer than ever, and would frequently climb up to the roof of Castiel's house, sometimes they would talk, but most nights they would just lie there and look at the stars.

Castiel could still remember the faint smell of Dean's cologne and he smiled when he thought about how he had watched Dean's every move that one night. Finally he had collected his courage, he half jokingly asked, "So, you gonna kiss me or not?"

Dean looked at him, eyes wide, "What?"

Castiel rolled his eyes, "Oh, come on, Dean. You should know how I feel about you, and I know you're thinking about it, so are you gonna kiss me?"

Dean looked like he wanted to reply, but instead moved toward Castiel and pressed his lips to Castiel's. After he backed away, he saw Castiel smile and soon he found himself kissing Castiel again.

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><p>After two years in college, Dean realized that if he wanted it to work with Castiel, he would have to get serious. So on Christmas, he took Castiel out for a fancy dinner, and right before the dessert came, he dropped to one knee and proposed. Castiel, of course said yes.<p>

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><p>They planned the wedding to be on the day of their first kiss. They spent the next 6 months juggling school and wedding plans. By the time it finally arrived, Castiel just wanted it to be over, so that he and Dean could be together, as a married couple.<p>

Dean spent the entire day nervously pacing his room. He couldn't believe that he was finally getting married, and to Cas!

Sam came in while Dean was struggling with his tie. He watched his brother for a little bit, before laughing and taking the tie from his brother. "Here, let me help you with that."

"Thanks, Sammy. God, I can't believe this day is finally here."

"Don't worry so much, Dean, you're getting married to Cas, man."

"I know, but I still can't believe he said yes."

Sam laughed and turned his brother around so that he could see himself in the mirror.

Before he headed up to the alter, he looked at himself in the mirror. He felt silly, but looked pretty good in his dark suit with blue accents. Sighing quietly, he opened the door and headed up to the front of the church.

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><p>Castiel wasn't doing much better in the nerves department. He knew that it would all work out, but he couldn't help but feel like something was going to go wrong. Right before he was supposed to go up the aisle, his best friend, Chuck came in and smiled.<p>

"You look great, Cas. I think it's great you two picked the coordinating outfits."

Castiel laughed as he looked at his tan suit with green tie, "It was actually Dean's idea. I can't believe I'm finally marrying him."

Chuck put his hand reassuringly on his friend's shoulder, "Calm down, you'll be fine. Just think of the honeymoon."

"Thanks, Chuck." Castiel laughed again.

"You ready?"

"As I'll ever be." He didn't even really remember his walk up the aisle. The only thing he did remember was seeing Dean at the end, looking so good.

After their vows, Dean turned to his husband and looked into those blue eyes, getting lost until Castiel brought him back.

"Are you gonna kiss me or not?" He whispered, so that only Dean could hear. Dean smiled and pulled Castiel in for a kiss.

* * *

><p>Right after Castiel showed the wedding pictures to MJ, Dean walked in the door. Castiel got up to meet him, giving him a hug. He leaned up to his husband's ear and whispered, "You gonna kiss me or not?"<p>

Dean smiled, giving him a warm kiss, "Every chance I get, babe."

**A/N: Remember, reviews are your friends! They get you mentioned in author notes, and they feed the inspiration fairies! Love you guys!**


	6. From the Moment I Could Talk

**A/N: OK. So I never said that all these were going to be ships... oh I did? My bad. This one is about Dean and John, because I love the two of them and I feel that their relationship never gets talked about... except about the hero worship when Dean was a kid. I planned this story around season 5ish? It's AU in the fact that John's alive... other than that, they're still hunters and John is ****_trying _****to be a good dad, emphasis on trying. (This is based on ****_Father and Son _****by Cat Stevens)**

Dean looked at his dad and could see the gears moving in John's head. "Dad?"

John looked at his son. When Dean had said that he had something important to say, John had not imagined this. He sighed and ran his hand over his face, "Dean, we've had this conversation, falling in love does not work well for a hunter."

"I know, that's why I want to get out of the life."

"After all you've been through? After all _we've _been through? What girl is worth more than your family?"

Dean looked down, suddenly very interested in a spot on the concrete. He muttered something under his breath.

John sighed, "What was that, Dean?"

Dean didn't look up, but he spoke louder, "It's not a girl."

John turned away from his son, running his hand through his hair, turning back to Dean, he yelled, "So not only do you want to get out of hunting, you mean to tell me you're gay?"

Dean looked up, fire in his eyes, but also something else, "Yeah, Dad. Is that a problem? Is it wrong that suddenly I'm not the skirt chaser, the Dean that took a different girl home every night? Dad, I want what you had with Mom, what Sam had with Jess! I want to know that there's someone for me, that keeps me from wanting to jump into every hunt I come across, not caring one way or the other if I come back alive. I want someone to come home to, someone to have a family with. Yeah, it's a guy, but that doesn't change anything. Love is love, Dad."

John suddenly realised that along with the fire, it had been sadness and hurt in his son's eyes. He thought that his dad wasn't accepting of who he was, and suddenly was faced with having to choose between a life with the man he loved and making his dad proud.

He moved over to his son and put his hand on Dean's shoulder. "Dean. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to yell. It's just a lot at one time, especially coming from you. When Sam went to Stanford, I wasn't surprised in the least, I knew that he wasn't really made for the life and hoped he could make something of himself. You on the other hand, you were always ready for the hunt, so much so that I worried you would never have a life outside of hunting. I thought you would die before you had a chance to live."

He laughed a little before continuing, "It's a bit of a shock hearing that you're gay or bi, because I've seen you chase skirts night after night. However, that's something I can accept, especially if you love the guy."

Dean looked at his dad and smiled. "Thanks, Dad. I'm gald that you're OK with it. Really."

John looked at his son, before wrapping him in a hug, "Dean. If it's who you are, of course I'm OK with it. So who's the lucky guy, anybody I know?"

Dean blushed, "Yeah. Castiel."

John laughed, "Of course. I should've known the only one you'd go gay for is the blue eyed angel."

Dean laughed, and playfully punched his dad, "Dad! Geez."

John looked at his son, "Why don't you grab your angel and we'll all go out for a beer or two. I'd like to get to know the guy that's made an honest man out of my son."

Dean rolled his eyes, and smiled. "Sounds good, Dad."

**A/N: Ok, so I comprimised... I can't write a story without some Destiel element. Well I can, but I choose not to. If you know the song, you'll notice I didn't quite go 100% with the plotline... I couldn't stand having Dean leave and John pissed... It goes against my little happy story in my head. So what'd you think?! Let me know! Remember... reviews are your friends! **


	7. Cut My Life Into Pieces

**A/N: OK. If you haven't hear of the Lock Project on Facebook, or somewhere, basically what's going on is that if you've ever gone through self harm, suicidal thoughts, depression, etc., you draw a coloured lock on your wrist. Even if you're just supporting the campaign, you would draw a pink lock. Anywho, I decided to write a story about it. Not surprisingly, it's really not hard to find a song dealing with the situation, but I picked Last Resort, by Papa Roach. I'm going to warn you now, because of the story and the song, the language is going to be a little stronger.**

***TRIGGER WARNING* This story contains suicidal tendencies, self harm, and various other things that could trigger flashbacks. If you have problems with reading this kind of stuff, please please don't read this chapter.**

Dean woke up in a hospital bed. At first, he panicked, trying to figure out how he had gotten there. Then he realized what had happened. Sam or Bobby must've found him and brought him here.

"Fuck. I can't even kill myself right." He muttered to himself. He could hear how hoarse his voice sounded from the rope and he knew there had to be a bruise.

"Is that really what you wanted to do?" A quiet voice asked.

"Huh?" He looked over to the other bed in the room, where there was a dark haired boy. He could see, even in the dark, the boy's eyes shine blue.

"I asked if you really wanted to die. Aren't you glad someone found you?"

"You don't fucking understand. I've got no one. I'm alone and just can't fucking take it anymore!" He tried not to yell, because it hurt his throat, but this kid was getting on his nerves.

The boy got up and quickly moved over to Dean's bed and flipped on the light. He showed Dean his wrists, which were lined with scars, showing years of cutting. "I don't understand?! I've been cutting for five years. It took five fucking years for someone in my family to notice that I never wore short sleeves, or that I always wore bracelets. You say you have no one that cares? Well somebody took the time to cut you down, or you wouldn't be here!"

Dean looked down at his hands and quietly responded. "I'm sorry. I didn't realize."

He looked back up at the boy's eyes. He held out his hand. "I'm Dean. Dean Winchester."

"Castiel Novak," Castiel said, shaking his hand, "Sorry that I yelled, but I do know what it's like, and a lot of kids that come through are just crying for attention."

Dean motioned for Castiel to sit on the bed. "It's been a rough couple years. My mum died in a fire two years ago, and since then I haven't seen my dad, except when he's fucking passed out on the couch. I've been taking care of my little brother since I was 16." Dean's eyes started to water, "Lucky for me, he's a smart kid, and can take care of himself. My Uncle Bobby tries to help us when he can, but he lives in South Dakota, so we don't see him much either. I had to drop out of high school and pick up jobs here and there just to make ends meet, and most of my spare money goes to my dad, who spends it on god damned alcohol. Tonight my dad and I had a fucking blowout and he told me that I'd be better off dead, because then he wouldn't have to worry about me anymore. What kind of father says that to their kid? My dad's a fucking asshole, but for some reason the words stuck. He's been telling me for a long time that I'm a fucking screw up and well, tonight was just the last damn straw. After I got Sam to bed, I tried to hang myself. I forgot that my Uncle Bobby was coming to town, and I guess he or Sam found me."

Castiel looked at Dean, and smiled sadly. "You seem like you'd be a good caretaker. You really care about your brother."

Dean rubbed his eyes, wiping away tears. "So, Cas, why are you in here?"

Castiel smiled at the nickname, "You mean aside from the obvious?"

Dean laughed, "Yeah, aside from the obvious, smartass."

Castiel smirked when he heard Dean laugh, "Well, I grew up in a very religious family. My parents were missionaries before my brothers and I were born, and we were all expected to grow up right. However, when I was 14, I came out of the closet to my family. Well, needless to say, that did not go over well. My parents ignored me and my two older brothers Michael and Balthazar picked on me endlessly. I began cutting shortly after. My other brother Gabriel caught me one time, and tried to get me to stop, he even stole my razors. However, where there's a will, there's a way. Anyway, this went on for five years, and finally my parents took the time out of their lives to notice something was wrong. They found my razors and saw my scars, and threatened to kick me out of the house. I knew that if they did that, I'd have nowhere to go, and would probably not last long on the streets. So I broke into the medicine cabinet and tried to OD. Luckily, Gabe found me and brought me here."

Dean was about to respond when a nurse came in. "Dean, good to see you're awake, but you two can't sit next to each other. Hospital policy, sorry."

She helped Castiel back to his bed and after checking the two of them over for any signs of self harm, she went back to her desk. After she was out of sight of the room, Dean headed over to Castiel's bed, and pulled the curtain a little, so she couldn't see them from the hall.

Castiel smirked, "I've got a rebel for a room mate, great."

"Hey!" Dean said, trying to keep his voice low. "So I just had an idea, how about when we get out of here, we find our own place. I mean I can get the money together quick enough, and maybe we could find a cheap little place, just big enough for us, and Sam."

"Dean-" Cas said, looking away.

"Sorry, it was just an idea, forget I said a damn thing."

"Dean, let me finish. I think it's a great idea. We could keep each other on the straight and narrow, because who better knows how to look for signs than us?"

"That's what I thought. You really wanna do this, Cas?" Dean brightened up after hearing Castiel say that.

"Yes," Cas nodded.

_-One Year Later-_

Dean and Castiel had been out of the hospital for six months, and had been living together in their little apartment for four months. After living together, they realized that they loved each other, and after a couple months, the sleeping arrangement switched around. Sam was ecstatic at seeing his brother in a good relationship, he also loved having his own room. Dean and Castiel had never been this happy in either of their lives. They knew that if they hadn't met each other at the hospital, neither of them could've made it this far.

**A/N: OK. That's done. I'm going to say right now. If you comment on this chapter, be nice. A lot of people struggle with suicide and self harming. I did, and I'm not alone, so if you have a problem with it, well, sorry. All I can say is I warned you not to read the chapter. I'm also sorry if the way I ran my little hospital is wrong. I've never been under suicide watch, but I have seen how some hospitals run it. So, sorry, again.**

**Moving on! I'm sorry that I put up such a sad chapter, but I wanted to do something for today! I was going to leave it without the little epilogue bit, but I couldn't... If you liked it, let me know! If you've got a song request, let me know! The fairies are hungry!**


	8. If Love is What You Need

**A/N: So the original title of this chapter was **_**If Love is What You Need, a Soldier I Will Be, **_**but fanfiction thought it was too awesome (aka long)... so. **

**OK. I cannot tell a lie. I learned about **_**Angel With a Shotgun**_** from a YouTube video about Cas. It's the perfect song for him! Check it out it's by **_**xchaz666x, **_**it's pretty awesomely done. Anyway. So I love this song, and I thought (probably not the first to think this, oh well), well, Cas is (was) an angel... and what if Dean were teaching him how to shoot? Anywho... I'm rambling. Contains slight season 9 spoilers... if you haven't seen the mid season finale, tread carefully. Enjoy the story!**

Castiel was ready to hit a wall, and maybe smite something for good measure. He'd been in the shooting range for six hours working on targeting. As the target came swinging back to the front of the room, he could see four holes spaced out over the torso of the target.

Dean smiled, "Not bad, Cas."

"Dean. I shot six bullets."

"Cas. Remember where you started? I think you made what... one shot?" Dean laughed lightly.

"I would much rather use a knife, Dean. It's similar enough to an angel blade, and it's my preferred weapon." Cas was getting frustrated with shooting, and Dean knew it.

"Cas, a knife is great for up close and personal, but what if the sonuvabitch starts running?"

Castiel looked up at Dean, and smirked, "I'll throw the knife."

Dean sighed, he knew that this was a fight that he probably wouldn't win. "And then? You get one shot. Let's just practice for a little bit more. OK?"

Castiel sighed. "All right."

They moved a new target down the line and Castiel got into a shooter's stance, both hands on the gun. He lined up his sights and fired off a round. He could see that it hit the target's left arm. He groaned lightly and let his arm fall to his side.

Suddenly, he felt Dean come up behind him and grab his hands, pulling them back up.

Dean spoke softly, his breath tickling Castiel's ear, "OK. Keep your hands steady. Now don't flinch when the gun goes off. It's gonna move a little on it's own anyway, so if you flinch, the shot will go wide. Look down the sights, there you go." Dean put his hands on Castiel's steading his aim. "Now fire."

Castiel did, and the shot hit straight center. He let out a breath he didn't know he'd been holding. Dean smiled lightly, still behind Castiel, "OK. Now empty the magazine. You got three shots left."

Castiel held the gun, with Dean's hands on his, and pulled the trigger, one, two, three times. He smiled when he saw all the shots create a cluster around the first. He turned to face Dean and saw his friend had backed away.

"That was all you, Cas." He brought the target back to the front, "Nice shooting, Tex."

Castiel tilted his head to the side, "I don't understand."

Dean sighed and chuckled lightly, "Don't ever change."

Dean went to the cabinet where they stored their ammo and pulled out another magazine, "OK, last round, do what you just did, and one more piece of advice, keep your breathing even."

Castiel took the gun from Dean and after taking a deep breath, shot six rounds into the target. When Dean hit the switch to bring it back, Castiel closed his eyes, not wanting to see where the bullets went. He heard the mechanism quiet, he opened one eye to peek out of, when he saw the target, he opened both eyes and smiled wide. He had a small cluster of six holes, right over the target's heart.

Dean wrapped his friend in a hug, and in that moment, Castiel knew he was with family. He had always considered his brothers and sisters in Heaven as his family, but suddenly he realized that they had nothing on this feeling of warmth and security from Dean. When Castiel regained his grace, he had had no intention of coming back to the bunker and staying in one place for too long. He knew the angels were after him.

However, Dean had prayed for him in a moment of desperation, after burying Kevin, and losing track of Gadriel. Castiel had done what he always did, and always would, he flew to Dean. Dean had crumbled in his embrace. Castiel had gently rubbed his back and spoke softly, "Dean, I will always come when you call."

Castiel also knew, that if and when Heaven opened again, he would not return to the place he had once considered home. Even if it cost him his grace again, he would stay here with Dean, his friend, and his only real family.

**A/N: OK. If any of that shooting advice was wrong, I've never actually shot a gun... so. I do know the basics of the stance and whatnot, but yeah. Anywho, the number of bullets I was going with was a standard Glock magazine, so 15+1 (in the chamber), so basically, he shot the six from the beginning of the story, and six before this little scene, leaving him with four shots. Just please don't shoot me for any facts I may have gotten wrong! (I can take the gun from you. ;) )**

**So the next story is going to be Sam/Ruby and ****_You Give Love a Bad Name _****(Bon Jovi) I promised a friend I would do it... I should have it up today hopefully.**

**Hugs and Kisses!**

**-Cas**


	9. An Angel's Smile is What You Sell

**A/N: So apparently I'm not the only one who loves me some Jovi! Haha... this is one I'm writing for a friend of mine, cuz he's awesome... and I've got him to join the fandom. He's completely thrown by the Sam/Ruby and Dean/Anna thing. (His exact words were 'so Sam screws the demon, and Dean bangs the angel... da fuq?') I, on the other hand, can't wait for Tuesday... :D So this little story is sort of AU... it's taking the ending of ****_The Kids Are All Right, _****and having Sam be a little more hesitant. Aaaanddd... I'm rambling again. Oops. This one's based on ****_You Give Love a Bad Name_**** by Bon Jovi and we are aboard the S.S. (Supernatural Ship) Sam/Ruby. All aboard.**

Ruby looked down at her chest where there was a smouldering gunshot wound. Her eyes flicked black as she looked at her attacker. "What the hell, Sam?"

Sam dropped the gun to his side when he saw that a) it didn't have any effect, and b) he shot Ruby. "Ruby? What are you doing here?"

"Keeping an eye on you, obviously. Why the hell did you shoot me?"

"We're here hunting a werewolf. It's kinda shoot first ask questions later right now. Why are you keeping an eye on me?"

"Well you never answered my question about letting me help you. Letting me be the angel on your shoulder. I can help you save Dean, Sam, don't you want to do that?"

Sam looked at the pretty girl in front of him. He sighed to himself, why is it that all the seriously dangerous girls they'd been dealing with lately were sexy blondes, in other words, just his type? "Ruby. I really want to say yes, but Dean is so sure that nothing can help him. I'm still not sure why you want to help me."

Ruby sighed and walked up to Sam, and before he could process what was happening, she was kissing him. "That explain why I want to help?"

Sam nodded dumbly, before gently grabbing her face and kissing her again.

"What the hell, Sammy?"

Sam turned quickly to face Dean. "D-Dean... what are you doing here?"

Dean gestured with his gun, "Hunting a werewolf, remember? Why the hell are you kissing this bitch?"

"'This bitch' has a name, Dean, and she would prefer you use it," Ruby said coming out from behind Sam. "But if it's such a problem, I can go."

Before Sam could protest, she was gone, and he was left to defend himself to Dean.

"Let's go." Dean said, slipping his gun into his waistband.

"What about the werewolf?"

"I ganked it while you were checking Ruby's tonsils."

Sam threw Dean a bitchface.

"Seriously though, I know you need to get laid, but Ruby? Seriously?"

"Yeah! Maybe it's because she actually gives two shits about me!" Sam finally snapped.

"What are you talking about? Sammy-" Dean yelled back.

"No! If you cared, you wouldn't have made this deal!" Sam stormed off, going to walk off his frustration.

When Sam got back to the hotel, he saw Dean passed out on the bed, a bottle of Jack in his hand. Sam shook his head and put the bottle on the table before heading to bed. Why did Dean have to be so damn stubborn?

**A/N: So I put in some Dean/Sam bro angst, because let's face it, season 3 was full of it! Anyway, lemme know what you think and/or if you have any song ideas, leave a review! They feed the inspirational fairies, who get stories to you faster!**


	10. Last Ones Standing

**A/N: So... OMG! WTF happened Tuesday night?! Wow. OK. Now that that's out of my system... I can write. The lovely ****_bunnygirl2012_**** suggested I do ****_No Matter What _****by Papa Roach. I love the song, and can make it a bit happier than the last Papa Roach song I did.. (if you don't know what I'm talking about, read ****_Cut My Life Into Pieces.) _****So this one is slightly AU. Not completely... **

Dean watched Benny leave. The vampire had muttered something about an old man and had walked away. Dean sighed to himself, he knew that vampire and he had purely a business relationship. Dean was using Benny to find Castiel and then a way out of Purgatory, and Benny was going to use Dean as a ride out.

Dean leaned back against the tree, and kept a lazy hold on his machete. At times like this, he really missed Castiel. He even missed the way the angel was _always _in his personal space. Dean smiled to himself as he thought of the last three years that he'd known the angel. As Dean thought about his friend, he found himself praying to Castiel. It was something he did often, even though he knew that the angel probably couldn't hear him, let alone poof in.

_Cas, I dunno if you can hear me, but I need you, man. Look, I know that over the last couple years we've had our ups and downs, mostly downs, but right now I don't want anyone else but you at my side. God, everything is so much clearer with you here... _

Dean sighed to himself. He had been struggling with trying to figure his feelings for Castiel out for a while now, and not having the angel around wasn't helping much.

_Cas, dude, I just wanna let you know that I don't think all that talk about us having a "profound bond" is bullshit anymore. I just wanna see you again, to know you're OK. Please be OK, Cas. I don't know what I would do without you. I...I think I love you._

Dean banged his head into the tree, what was he thinking? Castiel probably couldn't hear him anyway, and if he could, well, Dean just made it nine times more awkward.

* * *

><p>Dean saw Castiel at the river and ran down as fast as he could while checking for traps, and not tripping.<p>

"Cas!"

Castiel turned to look at him. "Dean? What are you doing here?"

"Well, when we ganked Dick, we both flew first class here, I guess." Dean checked his friend over for injuries, "You OK? I mean, no broken bones or anything?"

Castiel looked at Dean, blue eyes meeting green. "Dean, I am fine. You should not be with me. I am an angel in Purgatory, I will only attract the monsters."

"The angel has a point," came a smooth voice from behind Dean.

Castiel's eyes widened in alarm and he raised his knife as he looked over Dean's shoulder. "What do you want, vampire?"

Benny raised his weapon as well, but before he could attack, Dean stepped in between the two men.

"Woah. Guys, calm down for a second." Dean looked at both of them and when he was sure they wouldn't kill each other, he continued. "Cas, this is Benny, Benny, this is Castiel, angel of the Lord, and the one who raised my ass from Hell. Cas, Benny said that he knows a way to get outta here."

"Is this true?" Castiel turned to Benny, still brandishing his weapon.

"Well, it's for humans only, but yeah."

"Then how do you plan to get out of here?"

"Catch a ride on the Dean machine."

Castiel's eyes narrowed, "Dean, how exactly are you planning to get me out of here?"

Dean sighed, "I don't know, but you're coming with me. I'm not leaving you behind."

Castiel sighed, knowing that he couldn't change Dean's mind once it was set. "All right, I guess we are following you, vampire."

Dean smiled, and wrapped Castiel in another hug.

Benny rolled his eyes, "Come on, let's go, we have a long way to go before we sleep tonight."

* * *

><p>Dean looked at the portal in front of him. His way home. He grabbed Castiel's hand and was just about to enter, when Castiel stopped him.<p>

"Dean, wait. Before we go, if this does not work, I want you to know that I heard your prayers. Every single one."

Dean swallowed, "Even the last one?"

Cas smiled, "Even the last one. I just wanted you know that I feel the same, Dean. I have felt that way about you since I raised you from Perdition and put your soul back together."

Dean smiled to himself, but before he could act on anything, his mouth got in the way, "Let's get going, we can finish this moment when we make it back."

The hardest moment in Dean's life came a few minutes later when he had to let go of his best friend, and leave him behind in Purgatory.

* * *

><p>Dean was in the middle of working the case when he heard his name from behind him. He thought at first he was imagining it, the deep gravelly voice he hadn't heard for so long.<p>

"Cas?" He turned in his chair to face the angel. "Cas. Damn, it's good to see you."

"It is good to see you as well, Dean Winchester."

Before anything else could be said, Dean got up and kissed the angel full on. After a minute of shock, Castiel relaxed into the kiss and let himself enjoy it. When they finally broke apart, Dean smiled, "Together, we'll kick heaven's ass. No way can they take the two of us."

**A/N: So this fic was started last Wednesday, so that's what the freakout was about... I will be watching the new episode in about an hour. so.**


	11. Love is Like a Bomb

**A/N: So this is one I promised the really awesome castielsangelwings... like seriously, if you don't believe me on this, check out ****_How We Came to Be. _****It's sheer awesomeness. The prompt was guitarist!Dean and singer!Cas and ****_Pour Some Sugar on Me, _****which coincidentally my favourite Def Leppard song. Sorry if the characters seem a little OOC.**

Cas looked over his shoulder and smiled at his guitarist. They had just gotten to the solo, and Dean was rocking it, as always. Dean looked at Cas and grinned, driving the pace of the song. Cas laughed and started playing his air guitar, completely for show. Dean came to the end of the solo and Cas moved back to the mic and began singing:

_I'm on the highway to hell  
>on the highway to hell<br>I'm on the highway to hell  
>on the highway to...HELL<br>highway to hell  
>I'm on the highway to hell<br>highway to hell  
>highway to hell<br>highway to hell  
>momma, highway to highway to hell<br>And I'm going down, all the way down  
>I'm on the highway to hell<em>

By the time he finished, the crowd was louder than the speakers. This was always Cas's favourite time of the night, when the show was officially over, and they went into the encores.

"LOS ANGELES! You guys are amazing! Well that's our show, have a good night!" Cas always said the same thing, but they never left when they were supposed to.

Sure enough, the familiar chant of "Encore! Encore!" started before Cas even finished his sentence.

Cas laughed, looking at Dean, who was sweating, but smiling big. "I dunno, Winchester, should we oblige?"

The crowd screamed "YES!" just as Dean nodded, laughing.

"LA, what should we sing? Our show is in your hands."

The sound was overwhelming, but Cas could hear one song title. He looked at Dean, who nodded. He then turned to Benny, who was hidden behind the bass drum reading _Heaven's Outcasts, _their band's name. Benny smiled big and began into the intro.

As Dean started into the guitar riff, Cas grabbed a bottle of beer from the side of the stage and putting his thumb over the lip, ran back to the mic, launching into the next song.

_Step inside, walk this way__  
><em>_You and me babe, Hey, hey!__  
><em>_Love is like a bomb, baby, c'mon get it on__  
><em>_Livin' like a lover with a radar phone__  
><em>_Lookin' like a tramp, like a video vamp__  
><em>_Demolition woman, can I be your man?__  
><em>_Razzle 'n' a dazzle 'n' a flash a little light__  
><em>_Television lover, baby, go all night__  
><em>_Sometime, anytime, sugar me sweet__  
><em>_Little miss ah innocent sugar me, yeah_

"C'mon, y'all know this one! Sing with me!" He took the bottle and shook it, spraying it on the crowd as he went into the chorus.

_Hey!__  
><em>_C'mon, take a bottle, shake it up__  
><em>_Break the bubble, break it up__  
><em>_Pour some sugar on me__  
><em>_Ooh, in the name of love__  
><em>_Pour some sugar on me__  
><em>_C'mon, fire me up__  
><em>_Pour your sugar on me__  
><em>_Oh, I can't get enough_

By the time he finished the song, the crowd was doing most of the singing. The band ran through another four songs before finally getting off the stage. Cas was the first one back in the changing room, mostly because he didn't have any instruments to take care of. All he wanted to do was take a shower and head to their hotel and sleep. However, he knew that as soon as Dean and Benny got in the room, the fans with back stage passes would be allowed in, and even some of the ones that didn't have passes that snuck in.

Finally, after a good two hours of smiling for pictures and autographs in all sorts of semi-awkward places, the guys were able to leave. Cas headed to the bus and immediately laid down on the couch. Dean and Benny came in as soon as they double checked that their instruments were put away alright. Dean sat down by Cas' head and Cas sat up a bit so that Dean could move closer, and Cas could use Dean's lap as a pillow. Dean started carding his fingers through Cas' hair, causing Cas to moan slightly.

Benny laughed, "Remind me why I agreed to join a band with you two? Get a room!"

Dean smirked, "You needed a way into the world of the living in New York, remember? You were still working at the club... what was it?"

"Purgatory." Cas and Benny said at the same time.

Benny smirked, "Well, anyway, I didn't sign up for all this PDA shit."

This time it was Dean's turn to laugh, "Aw, c'mon man, you knew what you were getting into, and you know it."

Benny gave him a look, "If you say so, brother."

"I do."

The guys all laughed as the bus pulled out onto the highway, heading to their hotel.

**A/N: I don't own ****_Highway to Hell, _****it's just an awesome song that I put in the story... I hoped ya'll like it! I know that there wasn't any prompts for Destiel, but it's a major thing for me... I dunno why, but in most of my stories it's there.**


	12. Am I Still Enough?

**A/N: Howdy ya'll! So I didn't forget about this site and my lovely fans! I've been über busy lately with school and work and life in general. But! You didn't come here to hear me gripe about my life.. so away we go. Oh.. I am not Luke Bryan, nor am I affiliated with him in any way ~sigh~, so I do not own this song.**

Gabriel stood in the doorway watching Sam get ready for work. He sighed to himself, ever since Sam had gotten promoted to partner at the law firm he was working at, Gabe felt that he was holding Sam down. He could see the looks he got whenever he went to Sam's office, he knew people wondered why the junior partner was dating him, a baker from the wrong side of town. Sam said he didn't care what people thought, but lately they'd been fighting more and a couple times Sam had stormed out to spend the night at Dean's.

As Sam headed out of the room for the kitchen, Gabe grabbed him, pulling him into a deep passionate kiss. After they broke apart, Gabe looked in Sam's eyes, looking for any sign of emotion: love, happiness, anything that showed that Gabe was still worth something to Sam. Before Gabe could say anything, Sam pulled away, grabbing a to-go cup of coffee, and left for work. Gabe leaned against the wall and sighed. In a way, he'd gotten his answer.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When Sam came home from work that night, he could feel something was wrong. The lights were off, and there were no sweet smells emanating from the kitchen, or loud obnoxious singing.

"Gabe?" He looked in their room, "You sleeping, babe?"

When he got no response, he turned on the light. Gabe wasn't there and neither was some of his stuff, including Sam's favourite picture of the them together. On Sam's pillow, there was a note. With shaking hands, he opened it. He could barely make out Gabe's scrawl as tears welled up in his eyes.

_Samsquatch, _

_I can't tell you how proud of you I am. You made partner, and youngest to do it! But, _

_we've changed. I don't know if I'm doing it for you anymore. Do I turn you on at all, when_

_I kiss you, baby? Does the sight of me wanting you drive you crazy? Do I have your love? _

_Am I still enough? Tell me, don't I, or tell me, do I, baby, give you everything you ever_

_wanted? Would you rather just turn away and leave me lonely? Do I just need to give up_

_and get on with my life, baby, do I? Sammich, I love you, but please, think about what you_

_want, and when you know, you know where to find me._

_-Gabe_

Sam looked at the letter in his hands and thought about what it said. Gabe had a point, Sam had been married to work and hadn't been paying much attention to Gabe, as of late. Making up his mind, he grabbed his keys and jacket, and drove over to Castiel's, where Gabe most certainly was. He brought his car in behind Gabe's Fiat and Castiel's Prius and walked up to the door. Castiel opened it with a glare.

"Do you _know _what my brother is going through because of _you, _Sam?"

"I know. Is he here?"

Castiel sighed. "In the kitchen, eating me out of my ice cream."

Sam laughed softly and moved into the kitchen. When Gabe saw him, he stood up, and Sam pulled him into a deep kiss, matching the one from that morning. "Gabe, how could you ever think that I don't love you? I'm sorry."

Gabe looked up in his boyfriend's eyes, and seeing what he was looking for, pulled him in for another kiss. "Shut up and kiss me, Samsquatch."

After a few minutes, they were interrupted. "If you two are going to continue this, might I suggest you go home?"

They all laughed at Castiel's tone and then Sam and Gabe did just that. The next morning, Sam called in sick, and he and Gabe had a movie marathon on the couch, which turned out to be more making out that watching anything.

**A/N: So for some reason it's easier for me to write relationship problems, like serious problems, as Sabriel. I feel like Destiel is a lot of hot and steamy love, and a lot doesn't get talked about. However, Sam and Gabe are both very emotional, and I feel like a fight between them wouldn't get easily fixed, but it would eventually and cuteness would abound. **

**PS: What happened last night?! I was expecting happiness at the end there, and then and then!**


	13. All They See is Scars

**A/N: What?! Two in one day! Well, what can I say, I haven't posted in forever, and I want to make up for last time. And now for something completely different (a cookie if you get that), I tried writing this in second person, let me know what you think! Did you like it, hate it, or couldn't care less as long as I update? :D**

The doctor comes in to check on you again. He asks you all the same questions, and like always, you stay quiet. He checks your arms, saying that he's checking on how they're healing, but you know the truth, he's checking for new cuts. After he leaves, you pick up your book, _Slaughterhouse Five, _which you've read fifty times, but you don't care. You wish, like always, that you could travel through space and time like Billy Pilgrim.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Just like every day, your brother comes in for lunch. Just like always, he brings in a box of cookies. Just like always, you eat a couple, complimenting him on them. He smiles his thanks, but you both know that as soon as he's gone, you'll give them to the doctors to hand out. He talks about your family and how your parents basically act like you're on vacation and when you come back, you'll be cured. You scoff, knowing why you're here. Why you have the scars in the first place and you know no one in your family will ever see past the scars.

You don't tell him how you've met someone and how he sees you for you, past the scars, and into your heart. You don't tell him how you're getting out in a couple days and are moving in with your boyfriend. You don't tell him, and when he leaves, you give his cookies to the doctor and go back to reading your book.

**A/N: So, what'd you think? I know that I never really clarified which character it was. It can be whoever you want, I kind of made it Cas, but as I said, it doesn't really matter. **

**PS: Oh, I'm sorry with how short it is, but... c'est la vie. **


	14. Hell, Yes, I Love My Baby

**A/N: Howdy, ya'll! So I've been super busy lately! Sorry! I've got school, and two jobs, and yeah... you really don't want to hear my gripe do you? No.. didn't think so. Anyway. I've been writing stories, just trying to find time to type 'em up. So here's one.**

Castiel was sitting in his spot, on the only empty desk in Dean's garage, editing his current draft of his next novel. He looked up from his papers and watched his boyfriend under his car. He smiled to himself as he heard Dean talking to the car. He quietly hopped down and grabbed the tool that Dean was trying to reach and handed it to him.

"Huh?" Dean looked out from under the car, "oh, thanks, babe."

Cas smiled and went back to the desk. "Are you going to stop for lunch, Dean?"

"Nah, I wanna get this done before I have to go to work."

"Alright then, I am going to go inside and get something to eat." After a non-committal noise from under the Impala, Castiel walked into the house. He began making his famous burgers, making two plates, leaving one out for Dean. He took his into his office to work.

Castiel woke up and looked at the clock. 5:15. He must have fallen asleep over his work. He went into the kitchen and saw Dean's plate, untouched. Sighing, he wrapped it and put it in the fridge. Knowing Dean wouldn't be home until late, Castiel left a note on the counter.  
><em>Dean,<em>  
><em>I put your burger in the fridge if you want it. I hope you had a good night, and I will see you inthe morning.<em>  
><em>xoxo<em>

Castiel only woke for a moment when Dean came to bed and he fell back asleep with a small smile as he cuddled into his lover's arms.

When he awoke the next morning, the bed was empty, but it was still warm, so he knew Dean couldn't be far. Castiel wandered into the kitchen and saw Dean working over the stove. Castiel smiled as he sat down at the counter. Dean poured a mug of coffee and put it in front of Castiel, giving him a quick, good morning kiss. "Morning, babe."

Castiel hummed his approval, "What did I do to deserve this lovely breakfast?"

"Just being you. I haven't been home much lately, and I feel like I haven't told you how much I love you."

Castiel smiled around his fork. "And how much would that be?"

"Well, you know I love Baby, and pie, and Sam. But, honey, I love your love the most."

**A/N: So I've been writing a couple (not posted yet) in either first or second person. When I post 'em, let me know what you think.**


	15. I Hope He Buys You Flowers

**A/N: Woot! Another one! This one is second person Lucifer.**

You see him walk into your bar. It's been six months since he broke up with you. He walks in with a guy on his arm and you can't help but be shocked. He said you were the first and only man he had and would ever be with. You smirk to yourself, because you know you turned him onto the lifestyle. If you had known two years ago how it would've ended, you wouldn't have gotten together with him. That's a lie, you still would have. After all, you'd be lying if you said you didn't still love him.

You look up from the glass you're cleaning and fight the urge to go to the back when you see him coming up to you. "Hey, Lu, how you been?"

You try not to smile at the nickname, "Why do you care? It's been six months, Sam." You look at him. "Six months since you left, since you told me to go to hell and not to drag you down."

"Nick-"

"No. You know what, only my friends can call me Nick. You lost that right." You slam the glass on the bar and stand up, almost as tall as him.

He sighs. "Sorry, you're right. I just saw that you'd finally opened the place, so I thought I'd come see how you are. It's good to see you and I'm glad you're doing OK. Bye, Lucifer."

Something clicks in you as he finished talking and you call out to him as he turns to leave. "Sam."

He turns back to you as you continue. "Sam, I'm sorry for whatever I did to cause you to go, but I hope that guy you're with takes good care of you and does everything I didn't."

"Thanks, Lu, that means a lot." He smiles as you shake his hand and even pulls you into a hug. After he releases you, he goes back to his date, and then he's gone. Again.

**A/N: So what'd ya'll think of the POV? I felt really bad for Luci writing this, but my inner devil that was torturing him said it served him right for being too clingy, because that's what my inner devil says is the reason Sam left. Anyhoo.**


	16. Would They Know How Much I Care?

**A/N: I am on a roll! Yay! :D This is the last one I have for now, but I'll have more, don't worry. This one is based on the Garth Brooks song If Tomorrow Never Comes, but if you feel like listening to a good cover, Ronan Keating's version is the one I have on the playlist I'm basing this little collection on.**

I sigh and rub the bridge of my nose, looking up from the books. My night is far from over. I've been researching since the boys crashed and I can see that the sun is ready to come up. Getting up for another beer, I look over to the bed, where the boys are peacefully sleeping. Dean has his arms wrapped protectively around his baby brother. Sam, partly curled up, is gently sucking his thumb and occasionally makes quiet mewling noises.

I smile to myself as I get back to work. I have my faults, I know, but my boys are one thing I did right. I think back to the fire, six months ago, and how Mary was taken. My fist clenches as I think about it, I never told her how much I loved her and how I didn't think I could live without her. Now that I have to, I look at my boys and wonder if they know how much I love them. I know Dean is toughening up, making sure not to cry in front of me and always comforting Sam. Dean is already asking about hunting and I promise myself to keep Sam from the life as long as possible.

I look at the clock, which reads 5:30, and I know that if I don't get to sleep now, I won't get any until tonight. Sighing, I fold up the books and clean up the table. I finish my beer and shed my boots, getting into the bed. As I get in, the movement wakes Dean for a second and he shifts toward my body heat a little in his sleep. I smile to myself, Dean is a cuddler, even if he won't admit it. As I drift off to sleep, I kiss his head softly, then Sam's, whispering an I love you to both of them.

**A/N: So, first person John, what do you think? I'm sorry if you don't like him, but I think he honestly tried his best, and sometimes his ideas of what was best were a little warped.**


	17. The Beat Ain't Bad

**A/N: I am back! I can totally relate to Olaf right now.. Oh how I missed summer. I can't wait to regale ya'll with stories! Remember though, the faeries need food... and reviews are what they thrive on.**

Benny walked down the French Quarter, humming some old jazz tune to himself, when all of a sudden a woman bumped into him. He caught her by her waist and pulled her up, taking the time to notice how pretty, no... beautiful, she was. She had long dark hair and large brown eyes. She wore a deep red dress that only seemed to bring them out more.

"Woah, you OK there, darlin'?" He subtly played up his accent, which usually worked in his favour.

She gave a shy smile, "Yes, thank you. I would have gotten my dress all dirty if not for you."

What was that accent, Greek? "If it weren't for me, you wouldn't have fallen."

"Mmm.. true, but I would not have met you either," she smiled, "may I have the name of my handsome saviour?"

"Benny Lafitte at your service, Ms..."

"Kormos," Greek for sure, "Andréa Kormos."

Realizing that he was still holding her, he set her on her feet. "Would you, ahem, like to maybe have dinner with me? I know a great little place."

"That sounds wonderful."

"Great." He held out his elbow for her and led her down the road. As they walked into the parking lot, Benny smiled at the sight of the familiar neon signs all lit up.

"Guildry's?" Andréa asked. "Oysters, po' boys, and gumbo? Benny, I'm not sure about this."

"Don't worry, it's safe."

"OK."

Sensing her worry, he pulled her to him, "Don't worry, I know the owner personally, it'll be ok."

She moved closer, as if trying to hide. As they walked in, a pretty brunette smiled and greeted them.

"Hi, Mr. Lafitte, how are you?"

"Elizabeth, I told you, it's Benny. How many times?"

"Yessir, Mr. Lafitte."

Benny sighed with a smile, "Can I get a Guinness and..."

"Chardonnay, please."

"Coming right up." Elizabeth said, heading to the kitchen.

"So, are you a regular here?" Andréa asked.

"You could say that, I guess, sure."

Before she could speak, a young man with light hair and piercing green eyes walked up, "Benny! How ya been, man?"

Benny got up out of his chair to give the guy a hug, "Dean! How are you? How's Cas?"

"Ask him yourself." A raven haired man with deep blue eyes appeared with a baby.

"Hi Benny," the man said with a soft voice that would normally fit a chain smoker.

"Guys! When did this happen?" Benny gestured to the baby, a boy judging from the clothes.

Andréa cleared her throat causing Benny to jump. "Oh! Dean Winchester, Castiel Novak, this is Andréa Kormos."

"Nice to meet you guys," she said smiling at Castiel and shaking Dean's hand. "He's adorable, how old is he?"

"Six months. We finally got the paperwork to adopt him finalized last week. Benny, meet Samuel Adam Winchester."

"You would name your kid after a beer."

"Or you know, my kid brothers." Dean laughed. "Anyway, we gotta go. Sammy's gotta meet his uncles."

"Poor kid." Benny joked, as the guys all laughed. "It was good to see you, don't be a stranger."

After they left, Benny sat back down. "Sorry 'bout that. The three of us served together and I haven't seen them in a while."

"It's no problem. So regular, you guess?"

"Well, I own the place, so..." Benny trailed off.

Andrea's eyes grew big, "Really?"

"Yup, so what do you say we get out of here?"

"Sure."

He helped her out of the booth and began walking back to the Quarter, humming again. He pulled her in and began dancing to the tune. Dipping her slow, he brought her up to a give her a kiss. "Out of all the beautiful ladies in New Orleans, how did I get so lucky to meet the queen?"

**A/N: I tried so hard to keep it just Benny and Andréa... and then Dean and Cas showed up. Whaddya know? **


	18. When the Sound of Little Feet

**A/N: So I'm really sorry that I haven't been writing lately... but I've had a major strike of writers block and a case of the sleepys. Anywho, I thought I'd write some happy feels... be happy that I didn't write in the ending I thought about. If enough of you are curious, I could put it in as another chapter... just don't hate me!**

John woke to an empty bed. Checking the clock, he saw that it was only 2:30 AM. He made his way down the hall, softly calling out for his wife, "Mary?"

As he got closer to the living room he could hear Mary sniffling softly. "Mary, are you OK?"

She turned in the chair to face him, "Yeah, I'm just going through all these old pictures. Remember when the boys built the fort in the living room with crutches and sheets? We couldn't get them to come out for anything, not even dinner."

"Or cookies." John laughed as he looked over her shoulder, looking at some of the other pictures, laughing at the memories. "Remember this one? We made the mistake of leaving the two of them in the playpen and then ext thing we know Dean had escaped and taken Sam with him to play soldiers."

Mary laughed. "Dean was always good at getting himself in trouble. Remember when he got through all the childproofing and managed to down a bottle of Robitussin?"

"Our first hint that the boy would like his alcohol."

"Just like his dad." Mary smiled. She looked through more of the pictures. "Remember this one? Dean was off at basic training and you were at work, so I took Sam to Mt. Sunflower for the day."

"Oh yeah... and Dean was so pissed because you never took him on trips like that."

Mary laughed and flipped through some more pages before the book fell open to an envelope. "What in the world?"

She opened it and slowly pulled out the contents: a photo and a note on some lined paper. She handed the note to John as she looked at the photo, gasping a little. It was a picture of Dean and Sam at Sam's graduation from Stanford. They had thought Dean couldn't make it because he was getting deployed. However, the picture showed Sam in cap and gown and Dean in his dress uniform, white hat under one arm and the other around his brother's shoulders. They both had wide grins that made Mary's heart skip a beat with pride. "What's the note say, dear?"

"I'm trying to read Dean's handwriting," John said laughing, "OK, here goes:

Dear Mom and Dad,

I'm sorry that I didn't get to see you at Sammy's graduation. I thought you'd like to add this one to the book. Benny took this for us just before he and I headed back to base. Now that Sammy and I aren't there to drive you crazy, I hope you remember all the good times.

-Love, Dean"

**A/N: If you like warm, happy feels, then leave it there... if you feel like being sadistically cruel to your heart, let me know, and I'll put up the alt ending.**


	19. ALT ENDING

**A/N: So this is my sadistically evil ending to the last story... it's really short, but if you don't want sad heart wrenching feels, don't read it. I about cried... and I wrote it!**

John stayed with Mary until she fell asleep, then he snuck upstairs to Dean's room, which was just like Dean had left it, with one difference. A shelf had been added above the bed, with a folded flag and a note postmarked two weeks after Sam's graduation.


	20. So Only Say My Name

**A/N: I wrote and EndVerse!fic! Shocking! It's short, but I think it's hard to write a long end verse story.**

You sigh, taking another swig of whiskey. This is how many of the days pass lately, you waking up to an empty bed and hungover. Then the drinking starts again, just to forget. To forget your life before the Croats, to forget Sammy, and to forget_ him._ Your best friend, was that even what he was at the end? You go back to the bottle of Jack, not wanting to think about it. However, you know that all this grief has resulted in your personal hell. Thinking of all the days you have to face without him, you wish you could trade all your tomorrows for just one more yesterday. Finally, you go back to sleep, doing the one thing you know helps. As you fall asleep, you whisper his name. "Cas." Suddenly, just like old times, you feel him at your side.


	21. Cross My Heart and Hope to Die

Dean stormed out of the apartment, again. For the third time that week, he and Benny'd had a fight. Never physical, just a lot of yelling and throwing things. It was a wonder the neighbors hadn't called the cops... except for that one time.

As Dean jogged down the stairs, he heard their door shut followed by Benny calling his name. Ignoring him, Dean continued down the stairs and out to the parking lot and his car. Before he could unlock the door though, Benny caught up with him. Benny grabbed his shoulders, turning him around, back to the car. Cupping Dean's chin in one hand and resting the other on the frame of the door, Benny kissed Dean, softly, not fuelled by passion like those that always led to more.

"Stay. Please."

Dean melted into the kiss, like always, and like always, he forgot why they were fighting in the first place. He sighed, leaning back into the car. "Fine. One more night."

He knew that was a lie, that the same thing would happen tomorrow or the day after, and it would end the same way, maybe at the bar, or halfway down the stairs, but Benny always finds him and asks him to stay and Dean will always say one more night, night after night.


	22. Who Do You Think You Are?

**A/N: This is just a little thing I wrote... I felt like getting into Sam's head.**

Sam heard him all the time. Sometimes it was mindless chatter, other times it sounded like the man... angel? Devil. Definitely the devil was trying to get his attention with something serious. He spent most his time ignoring Lucifer, occasionally telling him to shut up, which, of course, only made Lucifer prattle on more. After all, negative attention was better than nothing.

Sam couldn't take much more of living with Lucifer. He felt like he was living a half life, dealing with the Devil and not telling anyone, because who would believe him? He couldn't tell Dean because Dean would flip his lid.

Even after going through hell, Sam still would see Lucifer. Something he would never tell anyone was that in the pit, the mindless prattle was comforting. However, Sam wasn't going to forget all the things Lucifer had done on Earth. Especially when he'd been using Sam as a vessel. Sam knew that all these things had left their mark. That's why when he was sharing his mind with Gadreel, he finally snapped. No way was he going to be a meat suit again. Right before he had kicked the angel out of his head, he told him,"I'm stronger than last time. Don't think I'm taking you back."

Gadreel left Sam's mind, never sure if Sam was talking to him or to Lucifer.


	23. But When I Sleep, You're Everywhere

**A/N: This is for one of my best friends ever. He's been my rock probably more than he knows and anyway... he suggested this song, so here goes nothing.**

Dean sighed as he lay back down on his bed, he couldn't remember what had make him wake up, but before he could open his eyes, he heard the flutter of fabric.

"Cas?" Dean had called out, hoping to see the angel, but he wasn't there. As Dean padded his way to the sink for some water, he quietly prayed to the angel. "Cas, I know you've around when I'm asleep. Why can't you stick around?"

He stayed by the counter for a few minutes, hoping to hear a flutter from somewhere, anywhere really, but nothing. Nothing... just like the last couple times Dean had tried to see Cas. Even Sam had noticed and would look at Dean meaningfully every now and then. Most of the time, Dean would glare at him, grab a bottle of Jack and go off to drown his sorrows, the manly way to say he'd go sulk somewhere.

One time though, Sam came to check on his brother and saw that Dean was asleep, his face still wet from what looked like tears. Sam sighed quietly, taking the bottle from Dean and setting it on the dresser. He turned to leave and saw Cas standing in the corner, watching Dean sleep. In a quick motion, Sam pulled him outside.

"What the hell, Castiel?" He asked, trying not to punch the angel.

"Hello, Sam."

"Hello? We haven't seen you in six months and that's all you have to say?"

"I see you when I can. You two are fully capable of taking care of yourselves anyway, are you not?"

Sam scoffed. "Well one of us is."

Luckily for him, Castiel didn't need an explanation. "Why was Dean crying?"

"Hell if I know, he talks to me almost as often as you do." Sam paused. "But I think it's because you haven't been around. You're his friend, Cas, why you don't get that is beyond me, but Dean needs a friend right now." Sam turned to go back inside. "Wait. You said you've been checking on us. Have you been watching us sleep?"

Cas looked away, "I wanted to make sure that you were alright, but I did not think either of you particularly wanted to see me..."

"Bullshit." Sam and Cas both turned to Dean, who was leaning in the doorway. "You've had to have heard my prayers. Y'know that profound bond we have?"

Sam raised an eyebrow, but went inside. He knew this wasn't a conversation for him to be involved in.

"Cas, I've prayed to you almost every time I wake up. How did you not know?"

"You did not let me finish, Dean. I was going to say until recently. Before then, you never really acted like you were happy to see me."

Dean shifted uncomfortably. He knew that part was true. "Well, you don't know whatcha got till it's gone I guess. I dunno, man, just lately I feel like you should be around more."

Cas moved closer to Dean. "I have felt the same, Dean, but you always made your opinion of angels quite clear."

Dean shifted a little and could suddenly feel Cas' breath on his face, "Yeah, but you're different. You're not like those dicks with wings. You're better. You actually care."

Before either of them even knew what was happening, they had crashed together in a kiss and both knew that Cas would never leave again.


	24. Nothing Like a Funeral

**A/N: Hey look! A wild fanfic! A wild mushfest has attacked! Would you like to ****_read? _****Please do. It's cute and adorable.**

Dean looked at the grave in front of him. His best friend had finally met his maker in Afghanistan. 4 tours and his luck had only stretched so far. He set a six pack next to the stone that read, "Benny Lafitte. Brother, Son, Husband. Only the good die young."

Taking a bottle, Dean raised it to the sky, "Here's to ya, brother. Second star to the right and straight on till morning. I'll miss you."

As he took a swig, he felt a presence at his shoulder. Turning, he saw Cas, his his high school friend from before the war. He'd seen one tour and had gotten captured. Dean had thought him dead until Cas showed up at the VA where Dean was working. Dean never thought he'd be so glad to see anyone, especially since Benny had just died.

Cas squeezed Dean's shoulder. "He was a good man, Dean. He was lucky to have you as a friend."

Dean scoffed, lightly, "I was the lucky one."

He turned and pulled Cas into a hug and suddenly remembered something Benny had said once, shortly after Cas had been captured. Throwing all caution to the wind, he pulled Cas into a kiss. Cas tensed a little at first, before relaxing into Dean. When they finally broke apart, he smiled, "What brought that on, Winchester?"

"I guess Benny's funeral made me think about all the things I hadn't done in my life and what I would regret not having done. I guess it's what I needed to feel alive."

"Well, it's about time." Cas said, pulling him in for another kiss.

Just before they left, Dean raised an eye to the sky. "Thank you, brother. Good advice doesn't go unheard."

With that, he turned and jogged back to the car, smiling when he caught up to Cas and clasped their hands together.

**A/N: So... whatdya think? Let me know!**


	25. I Don't Love You, But I Always Will

**A/N: Hi guys! I'm baaaack. Sorry that I've been gone so long. School plus work plus drama… yeah. Anyway. My finals are tomorrow and graduation is Thursday, so ya'll have my undivided attention again. This is one I wrote back in March, it just took me this long to post it. I know I'm horrible. Hope you like it.**

Dean's POV:

The first time we broke up, it was over nothing, really. I had gone out with Benny and Ash, and Cas had seen the waitress give me a kiss. He was gone before he could see me push her away and storm out. I got home to a "we're done" message under my door. He didn't talk to me for two days and when I was finally able to explain what happened, it still took a day for us to make up, but you know what they say about the sex…

Cas' POV:

The second time we broke up was my fault. I had begun to overthink every little thing and Dean had finally had enough. We lasted two days before we came crashing back together.

Dean's POV:

OK. I take full blame for this one. I fucked up, big time. I drank too much and got carried away. I didn't blame him for leaving and couldn't believe it when he came back. We had a lot of patching up to do and it took time, but we were back to OK. Until…

Cas' POV:

Cancer. The big C. After being diagnosed, the doctors warned me that life was going to change. Then they said the killer part, literally, it was terminal, I had maybe two months. I hoped to live them out with Dean and never tell him, but after three weeks, I knew I couldn't. We fought, worse than ever, and I left, telling him I didn't love him. I could see the hurt and betrayal on his face and I knew that he would hate me for a while, but he would move on, eventually.

Dean's POV:

After the fight, I tried everything to get Cas back. Called, texted, hell I even asked Gabriel to pass on a note. I got nothing. Finally, after three weeks, Cas' annoying brother called me back. The call was off from the start. No teasing or bad nicknames and by the time he hung up, I could barely stand. I crumbled in a chair, crying. Cas, my everything since we were 18, was gone, and the worst part was that he had known and never told me.


	26. Don't You Ever Say I Just Walked Away

**A/N: So I had a request from one of my lovely readers to write another Sabriel piece. Congratulations, ****_Tori-Bird627_****, you got me to write a Miley Cyrus song… consider yourself a miracle worker. I saw a Destiel video for this and I gotta say, I love the lyrics with them, however, I think that Sam and Gabe would have a relationship that would also follow the general feeling of the song. I'm not promising a happy ending, so we'll see where this goes. (By the way, I'm writing this A/N as I type up the first bit of my story, it's not done yet, so I'm not sure how it's going to end yet). Anyway, this one has pre-established Destiel, which kind of takes up a big chunk of the beginning, but once we get going, it's not all about Dean, no matter what he thinks. **

Sam and Gabriel came together in a whirlwind. Gabriel was a friend of Dean's, not only because he was Cas' older brother, but because he shared culinary classes with the older Winchester. The first time Gabe and Sam met was shortly after Sam had moved in with Dean, moving to California to go to law school. Sam had been unpacking when he heard a loud and boisterous "Dean-o!" from the living room. Biting back a chuckle, he went out to investigate, because no one got away with calling Dean "Dean-o."

Making his way into the living room, he saw the source of the noise was a man about Dean's age; short, with long blond hair and eyes the colour of American Honey. When he saw Sam, he raised an eyebrow, "Dean, who is this hunk of a moose, and why haven't you introduced us yet?"

Dean sighed, "Gabe, this is my baby bro, Sammy."

Sam blushed at Gabe's comment before correcting his brother, "It's Sam."

"Well, Sammoose, glad to meet ya. What brings you to the city of angels? Please don't say your brother."

Sam laughed at Dean's indignant "hey!" "I start at Stanford in the fall, but wanted to spend some time with Dean before I move to Palo Alto."

Dean beamed with pride as Gabe whistled, impressed by the young man in front of him. Gabe turned to his friend and grinned. "Have you introduced him to Cassie yet?"

Sam frowned. He didn't know that Dean was dating anyone in LA. He felt a little hurt that he hadn't met, or heard of, this new girl in his brother's life.

"Not yet. I wanted to take them both out to dinner, let them get to know each other. Knowing Cas, they'll hit it off in no time."

"Why don't you and I just cook for them, Dean-o? We are the older brothers who happen to be fantastic cooks."

Dean laughed. "OK. When?"

"How about tonight?"

"I dunno. Cas might have plans."

"This is Cassie we're talking about."

"Yeah, but Sammy just got here."

"Don't even try, Dean." Sam threw his brother a bitchface, "I want to meet this mysterious girlfriend of yours."

Gabe raised an eyebrow at Dean. "C'mon! Let's play meet the folks! I know Cas and I are your family here, but now we have another Winchester to get to know."

He waggled his eyebrows suggestively at Sam as Dean sighed. "OK, but that means you and I need to go shopping."

Gabe fist pumped the air. "Then what are we waiting for? I'm sure Sammich could use the time to unpack."

Dean looked at his little brother, who just nodded. "Ok, bitch, but keep the door locked."

"I'm not five anymore, jerk. Just go do your shopping."

As they meandered around the Farmer's Market, Gabe looked at his friend, "So why haven't you told your brother about Castiel?"

Dean sighed, rubbing the back of his neck, nervously. "Sammy doesn't know the real reason I moved out here. He doesn't know I got kicked out after coming out of the closet. I didn't want him to defend me and get hurt by John."

Gabe nodded solemnly, he knew Dean's story, probably the only one other than Cas who did. "So how do you think tonight's gonna go?"

"I don't fuckin' know, man, I don't know."

After Sam unpacked, he began looking around the apartment, seeing old family photos, from before their mom died. There was also a picture of their family (sans their dad) at the Roadhouse: Uncle Bobby, Aunt Ellen, Jo and Ash. He also saw several pictures of Dean and Gabe, some including a third man, a little younger looking, with messy dark hair and the bluest eyes Sam had ever seen. There were a few more pictures of just Dean and the stranger, Dean's arm slung around the man's shoulder and the man with an arm around Dean's waist. Sam made a mental note to ask his brother about the man in the photos.

As Gabe was slicing the vegetables for the gumbo they had planned, Dean texted Cas, letting him know about the dinner, telling him to be at the apartment by six.

By the time 5:30 rolled around, the whole apartment smelled like gumbo. Sam offered to set the table since the older men had done all the cooking. He had just finished when there was a knock on the door and the sound of it opening. He heard Gabe shout "Cassie!" and then Dean softly saying "Hi Cas" before the sound of a light kiss. Soon, Dean and Gabe came in the kitchen, followed by the man Sam had seen in the pictures.

"Wha-" he started, but was cut off by Dean.

"Cas, this is my brother Sam. Sammy, this is my fiancé, Castiel."

Sam looked between the two men, eyes widening before he quickly went back to his room.

"Shit." Dean swore, as he got ready to follow his brother.

"No. Let me." Gabe walked down the hall to the guest room, while Cas moved Dean to the couch.

"Sam-I-Am?" Gabe knocked on Sam's door, "Can I come in?"

After a moment of silence, Gabe opened the door. "Sammy? I know that my brother was not who you were expecting, but y'know what? When I first met your brother? He was not in a good place. Cas helped him out of whatever hell he was in. For the unabridged version, ask your bro, but if you're gonna be homophobic, I'm gonna hafta ask you to go to Palo Alto now."

"What? No! I mean, when Dean left, everything changed. I mean, Dad went from surly to drowning his sorrows in a bottle. I couldn't talk about Dean without my Dad blowing up, telling me not to be like my disappointment of a brother." Gabe moved closer to Sam, who buried his head in the older man's chest. Gabe froze for a second before hugging the boy. He barely heard Sam start talking again. "I couldn't even tell my dad that..."

"Tell your dad what?" Gabe asked, pulling away, so he could see the other boy's face. Sam hesitated, before starting to reply, but then crashed their lips together in a needy kiss. When they finally pulled apart, Gabe grinned. "Oh, well then, maybe we should let you meet my brother, huh? I can pretty much guarantee you'll love him, you ginormous nerd you."

Sam laughed as he pulled himself off the bed and held out a hand for Gabe. "You just want the food."

Gabe laughed too. "Damn straight."

Cas held Dean as the older man talked. "What the hell just happened? I mean, I expected shock, he has been living with John for 18 years, but Sammy's always been really open minded."

"Dean. Did he know about me before he got here?"

"No." Dean muttered, "My dad wouldn't let me talk with Sam after I moved out here and Gabe was the one the pushed dinner tonight."

"Then you can't really expect him to accept it right away, can you?"

"I guess not." Dean lifted his head to give his fiancé a kiss, when he heard the guest room door open.

Sam and Gabe walked in the living room as Dean and Cas stood up quickly.

Gabe smirked. "We're not interrupting anything, are we?"

Dean glared at his friend as Cas responded, "No. Is everything OK?"

Sam looked at Gabe before turning to his brother, "Yeah, I think so. Sorry I freaked the way I did It's just been a long time, Dean. I guess you changed more than I thought."

"Yeah, not really." Dean smiled sadly, "but that's not a story for over dinner. Let's eat and we can talk later, OK?"

Sam nodded. "OK."

After Dean and Cas headed to the table, Gabe grabbed Sam's hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. Dean caught the motion and gave Cas a small smile.

After that dinner, Sam and Gabriel were glued together at the hip. However, all good things come with their share of struggles.

"Gabe?" Sam came into the living room holding a stack of papers. Gabe didn't even have to look up to know what he'd found.

He sighed. "I was thinking of expanding the bakery and a college town seemed like a perfect fit."

"So you're looking at Palo Alto?" Sam dropped the papers on the table. "Half of these are for houses or apartments!"

"Can't start up a business and run it from here, can I?" Gabe closed his laptop, "What's the problem? I'd be closer to you, Sammoose. Isn't that a good thing?"

Sam was quiet for a little longer than Gabe was comfortable with before shrugging, "Yeah, I guess."

Gabe looked up at Sam, "It _is _a good thing, right?"

Sam sighed, "it just feels like you'd be coming to babysit. I mean, the whole point of going to college is to meet new people, have new experiences, y'know? I don't need my older brother's best friend to keep tabs on me."

With that, he turned and went back to his room, leaving Gabe wondering what had just happened. He was still mulling it over when Dean came home from his job at the Roadhouse. When he saw his best friend, the smile on his face faded. "What's up, Gabe? Is Cas OK? Is Sammy OK?"

"Huh? Oh, yeah. We just kinda got into it earlier."

"You and Sammy?" Dean raised an eyebrow, "What happened?"

"I'm not even sure. He found the realtor stuff I've been going through in Palo Alto and blew up over it. Said he didn't need me babysitting him."

"My brother said that?" Dean looked shocked and a little angry. He patted Gabe on the shoulder and headed down the hall to Sam's room. "Dude, what the hell, man? You left Gabe looking like a kicked puppy."

"Did you know?" Sam looked at Dean with red eyes.

"Gabe has been planning to move to a college town for a while now. I didn't realize he intended to go to Palo Alto until a couple weeks ago."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"He was planning it as a surprise and I thought you'd like the idea. Why don't you, by the way? You two have basically been Siamese twins this summer. Don't tell me you don't want him to go too."

"I mean, these last couple months have been amazing, but I don't know if I can be with him at Stanford."

"Oh. Dad got to you, huh? Maybe we should have that talk now. What did Dad say to you after I left?"

5 years previous

Sam heard the door slam and the Impala's engine roar to life. After about half an hour, he finally went downstairs, only to find his dad halfway through a six-pack. "Where's Dean?"

"Fuck if I know." John grunted. "All I know is that he ain't comin' back."

Finally, about six months later, Sam got a postcard from Dean. Granted it was signed Colin Meloy, but Sam knew his brother's handwriting anywhere. Besides, the chances of him getting a postcard from the lead singer of his favourite band postmarked LA were slim to none.

The next five years were rough. Sam got told every now and then not to be like his faggot of a brother which didn't make sense to him considering Dean was a playboy. John refused to talk about his older son and blocked contact, but every May a letter would come signed by one of Sam's favourite singers. Dean knew that his dad would never recognize the names, so he got to let Sam know he was OK.

Present

"So what happened that you got blacklisted?" Sam asked, finally able to bring the topic up.

"Well," Dean sighed heavily, "Remember Benny?"

"Your best friend in high school? The one you always went camping with?"

"Yeah, well, let's just say that those "camping" trips were inspired by _Brokeback Mountain."_

Sam's eyes widened as he began to understand what his brother was saying. "Wait, so.."

"Dad caught us and I got kicked out. I'm sorry I had to leave like that."

Sam hugged his brother. "It's OK. Do you think Gabe will forgive me?"

"I don't think he has it in him to hate you."

They came out into an empty living room, with no sign of Gabe. Looking around, Sam found a note.

_Dean- I know you'll probably kick my ass for this, but I'm sorry. I gotta make my own way. I'll let you know where I am when I'm settled._

_Sammy- Here's lookin' at you kid._

3 Years Later

"C'mon, Sam!" Jess yelled, "We gotta try this place out. The coffee is amazing!"

Sam rolled his eyes at his best friend, "What's the name of the place again?"

"Heaven's Confections."

They walked in the door and Sam was instantly met with the smell of cinnamon and nutmeg. The menu offered a variety of snacks and coffees and Sam picked one called the "Elvis" made with peanut butter and bananas. After getting a number, he and Jess sat down and spent a couple hours talking. After they finished, Jess left for work, letting Sam study. Eventually, a familiar voice cut in making Sam look up from his book. "Sammoose?"

"Gabe?"

**A/N: OK. So. This got long. I think I'm gonna eventually write a second piece to this… it may be the next chapter of this story, or it could be a while. I gotta figure out which song I wanna use. Anyway, rate, review, you know the deal.**


	27. When All Your Dreams are Shattered

**A/N: So this was requested by 46captain46, and because I was notified that 26 of my oneshots got read in a day, I figured this was a good way to say thanks. I wrote this one in the canon verse because I thought Dean could've had this internal struggle between episode 2 and 3 this season. Anyhow, here ya go! **

Dean heard his voice the minute they entered the bunker. He heard his name, quiet, like a prayer. Seeing Cas hurt made him angry, almost as angry as he had been when Ezek-Gadreel had used Sam to kill Kevin. No one hurt his friends and got away with it. The thing that hurt him even worse was that Cas had become like this because he was helping _Dean. _Cas grabbed his arm, offering _him _support, before falling unconscious.

"Cas!" Dean picked him up and laid him on the table, checking his wounds. God, there were so many. "Sam, get the kit!"

Sam handed him the first aid kit, already at his brother's shoulder. Dean spent the next hour patching up his best friend. Finally, he put the last bandage on and with Sam's help, he got Cas to bed. After Sam went back to his room, Dean sat down, not leaving Cas' side.

"Cas, I know we've been through a helluva lot, but sonuvabitch, you can't leave me now." He set his head in his hands, rubbing his temples. "Dude, this fight isn't going to slow down anytime soon, and right now, we're batting zero against the Darkness. But you gotta know, no matter how many times we get knocked down, I'll be there to pick you back up. I know you've lost so much, but everything you've lost, I've lost too. When you think you've got nothing, you've got me, man, no matter what.

Dean felt tears running down his face and rubbed them away with his sleeve. He took Cas' hand in his, rubbing small circles with his thumb in the back of his friend's hand, "Fight, man, fight whatever you gotta. I'll be here for you."

He laid his head down on the bed and as he drifted off, he swore he could feel his hand get squeezed.

**Alright! There ya'll go. I'm still taking recommendations! In fact, they motivate me to write, so R&R, please!**


	28. When I Was a Young Boy

** A/N: Please don't shoot me.**

It had been a quiet afternoon. Lisa was at work, Ben at school, and Dean had the day off, so he was sitting in the living room, slowly nursing a bottle of Jack. Not enough to get drunk, Lisa would kill him, but just enough to numb himself to the memories that were currently floating through his head.

He remembered the fire. He may have been young, but not that young. He remembered his dad putting Sammy in his arms and telling him to run. He remembers the pain in his father's eyes as Mary burned.

He remembered the Christmas where his father had left Dean to watch Sammy, leaving them both alone in the hotel room. That was the year that Sam had given him the pendant originally meant for John.

He remembered the first hunt that Sam had been allowed on. He'd been nine and begging John to let him go and when that didn't work, he began pestering Dean. Dean remembered calling the hotel room and hearing an excited Sam squeal in his ear. Dean also remembered never hearing about Sully again after that.

Dean remembered dealing with John when Sam packed up and left, going to Stanford. He remembered the week that John spent drunk off his ass and that they avoided California for ages, always handing the cases off to another hunter.

Dean remembered the warnings John gave him about Sam, telling him to keep an eye on his brother, to kill him if necessary. Dean remembered his dad dying on the floor of the hospital, leaving Dean alone to watch Sam.

Dean remembered everything and suddenly he had no one to share those memories with. He had one job. Protect Sammy from the demons. Looks like Dad was right after all, he is just one big fuck up.

**A/N: I'm sorry.**


	29. 500 Channels of Nothing but Bad News On

Sam looked over at Sarah on the couch. The two of them had been watching movies, spending the first day of Christmas break together. However, now she was flipping through the channels looking for something to watch. After seeing Fox showing footage of the most recent bombing overseas, Sam clicked the TV off.

"OK. I've got a better idea." He pulled Sarah off the couch and flipped the coffee table so that it would sit on the couch. With Sarah giving him a funny look, he pulled out a Dave Matthews record and dropped the needle.

Sarah laughed, "OK. This is your idea?"

Sam held out a hand, pulling her close and began close and began swaying to the music. "There are better ways to spend a Saturday together. There's too much crap on the news. What's wrong with just dancing?"

Sarah laughed again, " OK, but if we're gonna dance, we're changing the music."

Sam pouted as she switched records, this time the speakers began playing a mellow pop song that he's sure he's heard his dad listening to at some point or another. As a version of Simon and Garfunkel's _America _began playing, Sarah moved so that they were standing as close as they could. Sam hummed along for a while, "Who is this? I know the songs, but can't place the singer."

"Bert Sommer." Sarah smiled, "Best performer at Woodstock if you ask me. Now why don't we just dance?"


	30. Masquerading as a Man with a Reason

**A/N: Howdy, ya'll! So this one was a request from ****_angel de acuario. _****I was a little nervous doing such an iconic song (for obvious reasons), but here we go…**

After another sleepless night filled with dreams of Lucifer in the cage, Sam was in dire need of coffee and a solution. He had this wrenching feeling in his gut that he had to go to the cage, but he didn't know what he was going to have to do once he got there. He also knew that Lucifer is the key to defeating the Darkness.

He remembered the last time he was plagued with hallucinations of Lucifer. "Sammy this" and "Sammy that." Sam didn't know if he could do that again. He sighed as the coffee pot beeped, signalling fresh coffee. Why couldn't their job ever be easy? Oh right, they're Winchesters.

After Sam had downed his coffee, followed by a second one, he went back to his room, kneeling down, to try contacting God… again. What if he was wrong? What if God wasn't behind the visions? What if He wasn't going to help fight the Darkness? Dean was still telling him that God wasn't going to magically step in after ignoring the Apocalypse, the Leviathan, and Heaven getting locked up. Even so, Sam knew he was the key to everything, for some reason. So, he wasn't about to stop believing. He had to keep on this mission, even if he looked a little, OK, maybe a lot, crazy at times. With that thought, he began to pray.


	31. A Million Things That Need to be Done

**A/N: Heyo ya'll! So I've finally managed to fight the writer's block and get something done! Aren't you proud? Haha. So I kinda borrowed the plot from the music video, cuz it was really cute! So yeah, I don't own that… or the song. But yeah, you knew that. Anywho, enjoy!**

Dean was in the driveway, working on Baby, when Cas came outside to work on his garden. At least, that's what Dean thought. Every time he looked up, Cas would blow a kiss, or wink, or something to get Dean's blood rushing. He wasn't the only one; their neighbour, Meg, was watching Cas, following his every move. Apparently, she was unable to focus on her gardening, even as her husband, Nick, walked up to her.

Later that day, Dean and Cas were both in the kitchen. Dean under the sink, working on a leak, and Cas working on a pie, walking over Dean's legs as he worked. Occasionally, he would nudge Dean's leg with a smirk, causing the other man to have to focus twice as hard to finish his task. When he finally did, he pulled Cas in for a kiss, only to be rewarded with dough on his nose.

While the pies were baking, Dean was on the couch, reading _Cat's Cradle. _Cas walked up, pulling the book from his husband's hands and taking its place, sitting on Dean's lap, kissing him, long and deep. After being teased all day, Dean responded quickly, pulling Cas down to a horizontal position on the couch. Neither of them heard their new neighbours knock, casserole in hand. Nick had to pull his wife away from the door and back to their own home.

After the pies had cooled, Dean and Cas decided go to the lake for a picnic. The neighbours waved as they saw them leave, Dean in his leather jacket and Cas in a button down with a vest. Nick rolled his eyes as he noticed his wife's eyes lingering just a tad too long on the car.


End file.
